50 Pete Edochie funny quotes that will crack your ribs

Having starred in numerous Nigerian movies where he majorly played the lead role, veteran Nigerian actor – Pete Edochie is arguably the best Nigerian actor.

The father of six is well known for dishing out wisdom-filled proverbs mixed with humour in movies he features in. Irrespective of his role in any movie he always find a way of chipping in one or two wise words.

Today, Rosbena presents to you 50 hilarious proverbs by the talented Nigerian actor – Pete Edochie.

Read his wise quotes here

(1)

Pete Edochie - Having a female as a bestfriend is like having chicken for a pet, you will eat it someday

Having a female as a best friend is like having chicken for a pet, you will eat it someday

(2) 

A man who hangs around a beautiful girl without saying a word ends up fetching water for guest at her wedding.

(3)

Whoever presents his own head to break coconut would not be able to partake in the eating of it - Pete Edochie

Whoever presents his own head to break coconut would not be able to partake in the eating of it.

(4) 

The Cow in a hurry to go to America willcome back as corned beef

The Cow in a hurry to go to America will come back as corned beef.

(5)

When a girl has beauty without brains, the private part suffers the most - Pete Edochie

When a girl has beauty without brains, the private part suffers the most.

(6) 

Girls are like mangoes, once you are waiting for them to ripe, others are eating them with salt - Pete Edochie

Girls are like mangoes, once you are waiting for them to ripe, others are eating them with salt.

(7)

He who always thinks the soup is too much for the eba cannot handle greatness - Pete Edochie

He who always thinks the soup is too much for the eba cannot handle greatness.

(8)

It is only a child that doesn't know the vagina of cow is a meat - Pete Edochie

It is only a child that doesn’t know the vagina of the cow is meat.

(9)

The buttocks are like married couple though there is constant friction between them, they will still love and live together - Pete Edochie

The buttocks are like a married couple though there is constant friction between them, they will still love and live together.

(10)

If Something that was going to chop off your head only knock off your cap, you should be grateful - Pete Edochie

If Something that was going to chop off your head only knock off your cap, you should be grateful.

(11)

When a goat laughs upon hearing that the lion is around one needs to find out what kind of grass it has been eating - Pete Edochie

When a goat laughs upon hearing that the lion is around one needs to find out what kind of grass it has been eating.

(12)

The Plaintain that refuses to ripen because it doesn't want to be fried will be used for plantain chips - Pete Edochie

The Plaintain that refuses to ripen because it doesn’t want to be fried will be used for plantain chips.

(13)

A man who counts his money after withdrawing from the ATM has trust issues.

A man who counts his money after withdrawing from the ATM has trust issues.

(14)

He that is looking for the expiry date on agege bread is not worthy of being called hungry.

(15)

The Little Opportunity given to a monkey does not guarantee it to join the dinning table.

(16)

Once a Girl stops taking pictures and you don’t see her online, just know she is pregnant.

(17)

A man who swallows a whole coconut has complete faith in his anus.

(18)

As powerful as the king is he cannot command anybody to help him pass faeces.

(19)

It is a man who does not know how to enjoy life that finishes the meat first when he is served food.

(20)

By time the fool has learnt the game, the players have dispersed.

By time the fool has learnt the game, the players have dispersed.

(21)

Stupidity is what we all have in common as human beings, but some people insisr that improving it is their entitlement

Stupidity is what we all have in common as human beings, but some people insist that improving it is their entitlement.

(22)

The House that pound yam noisily thinks the silent ones don’t eat.

(23) When one’s goat get missing, the aroma of a neighbour’s soup get suspicious.

(24) Never open the door for an Armed Robber, let them break it, it’s part of their job.

(25) One Man’s food is every other man’s food, just because one idiot refuses to eat it doesn’t make it poison

(26) The only person that reads the terms & conditions is the one who writes it.

(27) A woman’s greatest perfume is the fragrance of her man’s success

(28) The chief who doesn’t know what to say says that his friend has said what he would have said

(29) No matter how rich you are, you cannot pay for your sins

(30) It requires wisdom to understand wisdom; the music is nothing if the audience is deaf

(31) Be careful about the rumours you hear about a lady, it either comes from a man who can’t have her or a lady who can’t compete with her

(32) No matter how dark the room is, a man will always find his way to the woman’s breast

(33) Just because you met them at the church doesn’t mean they’re the one, Demons go to church too

(34) Kindness is like butter, it works best when you spread it around

(35) Sometimes you have to play the role of a fool to fool the fools who thinks they are fooling you

(36) Fake hair, fake nails, fake eyelashes, artificial face and sometimes fake behaviour, yet a woman will say she needs a real man

(37) If you have a mum, there is nowhere you are likely to go where a prayer has not already been

(38) Give them a chair if they can’t stand your Success

(39) A wise person knows that there is something to be learned from everyone

(40) A girl may never get married if she waits for the “PERFECT MAN”

(41) The death of a lion cannot be announced by a goat

(42) Politicians are the same all over. They promise to build a bridge even where there’s no river

(43) The words of the elders do not lock all the doors; they leave the right door open

(44) Be careful who you trust! Salt and Sugar are both white

(45) If you have a mum, there is nowhere you are likely to go where a prayer has not already been

(46) When the house-rat starts calling itself bushmeat because it is getting fat, it has started passing its boundary

(47) If a man wants to grow a long tooth, he should have the lip to cover it

(48) The Frowning of a he-goat does not stop it from being priced

(49) The wolf on the hill is not as hungry as the wolf climbing the hill

(50) When the cock is drunk, he forgets about the hawk

 

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