While growing up in a Nigerian home there are so many things that happened within our household and during those times, we usually feel as tho it only happens in our family until social media came and we began to see memes and discover that all these things happen in other Nigerian homes as well.
Sometimes I wonder if there is a manual somewhere with which all Nigerian parents use in running their home.
Here are 10 things that happen in almost every Nigerian home
(1) In my Days I used to carry first
Since I was born and now that I’m getting old I have never seen a Nigerian parent that even takes second, all of them use to carry first in their days ????. Ok! Sir/Ma we believe you o, but who use to carry last na?
(2) When Your Mum/Dad is Sleeping and you try to change the TV Station
We’ve all experienced that awkward moment when our mum or Dad sleeps off while watching the news and the moment you try the change the T.V Station, the next thing you will hear is “Can’t you see that I’m still watching the news? If I slap you ehn you will drop that remote”.
(3) Mum always volunteer to help you keep the money visitor gives to you and you will never get it back
You remember that moment that visitor or Uncle or Aunt gives you some money when he/she is leaving and the first person that comes to you is your Mum with a smiley face promising to help you keep the money safe? When you need the money and go back to her she will remind you of how she carried you for nine months in her belly and breastfed you and cleaned your sh*t when you were small and asked if she took payment from you for her services. The funny and amazing thing is how we never learned from this mistake and still trust her again with our money and as expected she will still fall our hands again?
(4) Go and wear your slippers and you will follow me
This one was my mum’s constant trick she used for our last born whenever she wants to leave him at home when going out. As soon as he starts crying to follow her out, the next thing she will say is “OK! Go and wear your slippers and you will follow me” and soon as he goes in to wear his slippers, she will take off.
(5) You can’t eat Outside
Nigerian parents always warn their kids never to eat in anyone’s house and when you go out with them on a visit and the host ask you if you’re going to eat, your mum is going to give you enough body language to say no and at this point, you only have two option which is to obey her and not eat or to eat and never return home because you are as good as dead ??
(6) Mum always Makes you feel blind
I was a victim of this one on several occasions. There were so many times my mum will tell me to go into her room to get something and she will direct me to the place she kept it and I’ll search tirelessly and will never find it. Then I go back to her and tell her it’s not there and she will be like “If I go there and see it what will I do to you?” and she goes there and boom! there is the thing you have been searching for ??.
(7) You have attempted Murder if you dodge when your mum is beating you
Whenever your mum is beating you, don’t ever make the mistake of dodging or trying to defend yourself. If you ever try that just be prepared for a family meeting where you will explain why you tried to kill your mother.
(8) You can’t trust containers
You can never trust any container in a Nigerian home, there are times you will find an ice cream container at home and you quickly open it only to find beans or soup inside ??
(9) Your Phone/Laptop is the cause of your sickness
If you are the type that operates your phone or laptop constantly in a Nigerian home, whenever you fall sick don’t even try to look for sympathy from your parents because for them your phone/laptop is the cause of your sickness.
(10) Why Can’t your friend come and visit you, must you be the one to Visit?
Whenever you are done with all your house chores and you want to go and visit your friend but your parents don’t want you to go, this is the excuse that they hold on to “Why Can’t your friend come and visit you, must you be the one to Visit?”
Are there other experiences you had while growing up in a Nigerian home that didn’t make this list? Let us know about them in the comment section below.
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